I know I haven't written in a while but I am working on a big catch up blog entry that will be up soon. In the mean time I got a new kitty cat and was wondering if you guys would help me name her. She's really sweet and likes to snuggle. Here are a few pics.
There are so many people in this country; usually those that are working in some humanitarian capacity that talk about the Handout mentality of the Basotho (People of Lesotho). There are dozens upon dozens of organizations here that come in and give people money; or food or jobs. From NGO's to churches; to individuals who've decided on their own that they want to do something good for the world. This has been going on for probably as long as Lesotho has been around; so much to the point that there are Generations and Generations of people here that don't know what it's like to work for something.
The only way that I can really think to describe it is to compare these people to the children of rich parents. In many cases rich kids are handed things their entire lives. They don't know the value of hard work and parents have a really hard time getting them to get off their lazy bums and do something that will sustain their lives instead of living off Mummy and Daddy.
The only problem; actually there are several problems in this situation...some of the main ones being that there is no way for the people of this country to help themselves if one day, the gravy train decides to a grinding halt and as for in the work of those of us in the Peace Corps; how the heck are we supposed to convince the people of this country to do any work if they're always looking for a handout.
When I first arrived at my site and would have meetings with the people of my community they would all come in droves and be very excited about thee ideas that I would present to them. But once the actual work needed to be done on projects the people were no where to be found. I planned a pitso (community meeting) on Sunday of last week and of course; being an American I was on time and prepared to wait for a least an hour for the meeting to get started because that's the way things work in this country. I did wait for my planned hour with the Chief and one of girls from my community and no one showed up. I was a bit frustrated but the Chief suggested that we re-schedule the meeting for Thursday. So; we re-scheduled and I headed back to my little house.
Thursday rolls around and I head back to the Chief's house for another attempt at the pitso. I arrive and the Chief tells me that the community had two deaths during the night and people probably won't come. I'm pretty frustrated at this point. The Chief tells me that we will re-schedule again and I start heading back to my house. On my way; one of the community members stops me and asks why I'm leaving; because they are on their way to the pitso. I head back to the Chiefs place and let her know that people are in fact coming. In the end; only three women show up. We discuss all of the things I want to and they give me their opinions and answer my questions. All in all it's actually a pretty successful meeting since at least some members of the community have shown up.
During the meeting I ask this question; about the “Handout Mentality”; which I of course have to explain a few times to the women. When they finally understand what I'm saying they completely agree with me. They say that yes; in order to get the people in the Basotho culture to do something you must offer them something; whether it be food at the meeting or some sort of prize. As long as something is being given away for free; you will always have a large group show up to your meetings.
So; the big question. Since I'm a volunteer and don't have the money to lavish the people of this community with free gifts of food and the like (and even if I did have the money I wouldn't); how on earth do I get them to do work without immediate gratification. How do I prove to them that in the end they will reap the rewards??? The answer? Well; none of them really had an idea. They all agreed to help me with the projects I am working on and we moved on to other things. Needless to say; I'm frustrated.
Don't get me wrong; there are many people that I've met in this country that are passionate about change and they do know the value of hard work. I also find that those that I've spoken too are having the same problems I am. And their answers are always the same; all they can really do is continue to work on the projects they're working on and continue to help those willing to do the work; no matter how large or small in number they may be.
Sometimes I think that I'm not as invested in this country as the people of it; and I guess not being a Masotho; I can't be. I am passionate about Lesotho and it's people and the fact that there are people here that I've grown close to makes me want to make a difference but end the end I always go back to Kenya. I always go back to the fact that I couldn't stay and I didn't go back. So in the end; why should the people here put their faith in me and rely on me. Why should they listen when in the end; I'm just going to go home?
This blog has turned into a bit of a bitch fest. Maybe I won't even post it. Hell; two posts in a matter of days; my readers may not know what to do with themselves...
1. X-mas/ New Years:
I actually got to talk to a lot of you during x-mas and new years since I spent most of that time staying at the Ambassador's residence taking care of their puppy/house sitting. Originally there were just going to be a few of us for X-mas dinner but a number of volunteers' plans fell through so I made dinner for about 8 of us. It was really nice. I made a ton of food; including a leg of lamb which I was very proud of and a delicious Peace Cobbler which was a definite hit. Sorry there aren't more pictures but my battery was dead and I forgot the charger. New Years was nice and simple; it was just me and one other volunteer at the Ambassador's. We played board games and drinking games and made Jello shot jigglers in x-mas shapes. That was cool.
Note: Sorry; was gonna load pics from x-mas but they're too big...will do it when I'm not paying for internet :-); oh, and same for Egypt Pics
2. Supervisor Insanity:
After the Holidays I headed back to site to find that my supervisor had lost her mind. She was always a generally nice person but never very personable. Not like the other nurses who'd invite me over and try to get to know me. I just assumed that she was someone who liked to keep to herself; but the day after the inauguration I learned that this was not the case.
She'd offered to let me share her refrigerator at the clinic which I accepted. She's very weird about locking the fridge. I'm not sure who she thinks is going to steal her food but; yeah... anyhoo she had two keys. She gave me one and kept the other. The morning after the inauguration she sent me a txt message saying that she'd lost her key and would I bring her mine. At the time, I was in Maseru and sent her a message back letting her know where I was and that I would bring her the key as soon as I got back to the clinic. When I returned to the clinic and asked where she was, I was told she was busy with patients so I said I'd come back later.
Now; hindsight being 20/20 I could have just left the key with one of the other nurses but I didn't think of it. I had every intention of going back. I went to my house and promptly fell asleep. At about 4:30 I hear a knock at my door and it's one of the men from the clinic telling me that my supervisor wants to see me. I assume she wants her key back. I go to her door and immediately she starts yelling at me. Telling me that I've “disrespected” her by not returning her key when she asked for it. I won't go into it all but she yells at me to the point that I'm in tears and demands that I take my things out of her fridge. She tells me that she doesn't care if I'm sorry; nor does she care what I do with my food; when I point out to her that I don't have anywhere else to put it and that it will go bad.
I then leave her house in tears planning to take my food out of the fridge. One of the other nurses sees me and calls me into her house. I explain what happened and she goes to the Supervisor trying and smooth things over or at least figure out what really is wrong with this woman. That only makes the situation worse. My Supervisor storms into the other nurses house demanding her key and refuses to discuss it any further. The other nurses have no idea what to do. So, at this point I don't have my food and no way to get it. The next day, one of the nurses tells me that she talked to my Supervisor and convinced her to let me use the fridge until my food was gone. It all just gets worse from there. She began to treat me like a red-headed step child as my Mother might say. None of the project ideas that I present to her are approved. She began only speaking to me in Sesotho because apparently after being here for 8 months I should be able to speak to the language fluently. Peace Corps came out to talk to her but things never got better. Last week I made the final decision with my APCD (Assistant Peace Corps Country Director) to stop working at the clinic; at least until the new Supervisor starts in June.
The whole experience has been a bit of a nightmare. I feel like I was being a bit naïve thinking this woman was nice initially. I've always considered myself a pretty good judge of character but she just kinda came out of nowhere. I keep telling myself I need to focus on the good things happening at my site. Other things are going really well. My Library is coming along slowly but surely. I have a youth group that's also doing really well; I have a study group helping some of the High School students with English and I've started to work with World Vision. I'd really like to continue with my work and ideas for the clinic and it sucks that this woman is preventing me from doing that but I'm trying to be positive.
3. Egypt:
After Peace Corps met with my evil Supervisor I was happy that my Egypt trip was just around the corner. It was definitely a world wind Adventure. I met the other folks at the Jo'burg airport and we took the red eye to Cairo. We arrived at about 5am and thought we would have some time to sleep a bit; but nope. We got our VISA's, headed for the hotel and went straight into the touring after discussing some additions to the tour. We pretty much saw everything you'd want to see in Egypt; swam in the Red Sea, ate some amazing food and had a great time. It was a little bitter sweet for me to see all my friends from Kenya only to say good-bye to them such a short time later; especially since they're all leaving Peace Corps Botswana in a few months time. But it was great to see them all.
Everyone keeps asking me what my favorite part of the trip was and I guess I'll have to go with seeing the Pyramids and riding the camels. I think I kept trying to convince myself that I wasn't dreaming the entire time. Here are a couple of pictures from the trip. I've posted the rest of them on flickr : Maya's Egypt Pics and here are some pics from one of my other travel companions: Shannon's Pics Enjoy!
4. Back to Lesotho:
Since I've been back from Egypt I've tried to get back to the grind of things. And like I've said before things are going okay. I do find myself staying in my little house more often than I should these days. It's hard when you don't have something that you're suppose to do every single day for a few hours. I need to push myself a bit more to get things done. I've made a list of all the stuff I wanna do and am trying to get back into my running/pilates routine again. I did go to Bloemfontein last weekend to try and be more social with the other volunteers. I had a good time watching movies and eating good food and I did get to know a few volunteers a bit better; so that was nice. Unfortunately, being in South Africa is a little like going back in time 60 years back home for me. I know there's still racism back in the States but it's a completely different story when you have to deal with it directly. I guess I've been a little naïve in that respect as well.
Well; that's all for now. And I always say I'll try to write more often but now since I finally got the internet to work on my computer; it's a bit more likely. Hope everyone else is doing well back home. I miss you all!!
-Maya :-)
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I might put her in my suitcase on my way home in 2 years:-).JPG)
